Things That Please Michael J. Cohen

Blowjobs
Punctuality
South Beach
Fake titties
Deep talks about rims, hoes, and bling
Girls who speak only when spoken to
Girls willing to sign a pre-nup
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Things That Anger Michael J. Cohen

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Mushrooms
Girls that fuck a bunch of dumbass guys and then think they have a chance of marrying Michael J. Cohen
Illiterate girls because they are unable to sign a pre-nup
Non-Jews that give financial advice